Monday, October 20, 2008

Not to be anxious...

Today I have struggled with many deep emotions and have found myself stopping on my way to class to cry. I will explain more in a different post but what I wanted to share today was that God sure knows how to calm you. Anxiety has been taking over my life lately more than it ever has before. I have been worrying so much about so many things that I forgotten to take care of myself physically and spiritually. Today I started a bible study with some girls on campus and we meet ever Monday. Ruth McWhite a woman dear to my heart wrote this herself and is leading it. It is called Pathfinders. It is all about finding yourself in Christ. When I am finished with this 28 day bible study I hope to have found security in the arms of my maker and what it says in Philippians 4: 4-7 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again; rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hears and MINDS in Jesus Christ." will be true to my life. I all caps Mind in the passage because I have a problem with letting my mind take over who I am. And with my struggles now I will not let my mind defeat me with thoughts only of what is wrong but for what is right with my Lord. I am not always happy with the Lord. I have been through so much in my lifetime so farr and I know these things that are broken in my life will allow me to further Gods Kingdom and be the woman He wants of me. But at this moment I am struggling understanding His will for my life. I am now stiving to walk the path of Christ and know it so well that when the lights go out I will be walking so close to the Lord and I will trust completely so that things are going to be okay and I will have a calmness in Him and not in others, and because of this I know this Bible Study will be that for me.


On a different note I also have something else that I am learning to deal...

A is a very special person in my life shared something with me and she said in these words "getting close to people always involves risk. Never let the fear and risk overcome the potential blessing it could be to really let someone know you." I have the tendency to not open up fully to people because of my fear in getting hurt because I have been deeply scared in my past and still today struggling with the baggage. I now am learning to be more willing open to people in my life who truly want to know about me and want to be there for me.

6 comments:

Annie said...

I love you! I love everything about who you are, even when you make me nuts! LOL I am praying for you.

Anonymous said...

what a day! YOU MADE IT!

Anonymous said...

I love you. You're the best friend ever. I'm proud of you and I'm praying for you.

Keep learning. Keep growing.

TCW said...

I will be praying that you get everything out of this Bible Study that you want and more.

britnie said...

i'm praying for you too amy!!
& let me reiterate the fact that we are so much alike it's scary ;)
it's really awesome to see how the Lord places people in your life at the perfect time ;)

Anonymous said...

Amy, I am praying for you always. It sounds like God has placed some really special people in your life. Stay focused on your goals and two years will fly by and Amanda will be back. She will see how strong you are in your faith. Love you lots. Your mom who is here for you always and is one of your biggest fans (even when I can't get you to talk!) You will. LOVE, MOM